Pictures (as promised WEEKS ago)

The kids and I spent a day at the Lincoln zoo during Tom’s drill weekend earlier this month.  I had forgotten just how great the Lincoln zoo is….so much smaller scale than Omaha, but totally “doable” for a mom by herself with two kiddos!  

Sorry the pictures are all you get today – I spent most of naptime taking a nap myself!   We get an extra couple days at home this week….poor Micah man has hand foot and mouth disease, so no daycare for us!  And, I probably lost my mom of the year award – the poor guy fevered all day yesterday and was a drooling, slobbering mess. I attributed it to his 2 top eye teeth that are just about to burst out of his poor swollen gums and when the fever was gone today I sent him to daycare.  He had a rash on his buns, but I blamed that on the fever yesterday…..less than 2 hours after I dropped them off at daycare, the babysitter called to say Micah had broken out in red spots on his hands, feet, and mouth.  Like I said…mom of the year.  Or maybe not. 

Quick 5 (Things I LOVE this week)

1.)  Makenzie’s new night light.  Less than $5 at Pamida and seriously a miracle worker!!  After I left for Texas for 4 days (which came at the end of Tom’s 30 days away from home), Makenzie went into some sort of crisis mode and decided she couldn’t sleep through the night.  Literally, EVERY.NIGHT.  She’d be in our room sometimes as many as 4 times…and each time I’d take her back to bed and lay in her bed with her until she fell asleep (sometimes I’d just sleep there the rest of the night because I’d fall asleep before she did).  Anyway…she always told me she was scared…so finally one day, I got smart and asked what her help her to not be scared.  She said leaving a light on….not really an option, particularly since she and Micah share a room….but we compromised, went to Pamida and bought a night light.  That was 10 days ago and she hasn’t been up a single time since!  LOVE that nightlight…and that girl….and the fact that the nightlight keeps the girl in her bed all night so I can stay in mine!

2.)  Micah’s pacifier.  Another miracle working tool at our house.  I tried to take it away today and after 20 minutes of screaming his head off at nap time, I gave it back.  I promise I’ll get rid of it before he starts Kindergarten, but for now it provides me a much needed break from Micah man’s high pitched screaming.  And, I just can’t resist when he looks at me with those big blue eyes and says in his saddest voice, “pa, pa, pa.”  LOVE the paci….and the boy….and the fact that my boy still takes 2 naps a day and sleeps all night if he has his paci so I can sleep too!  I promise not everything on this list has to do with me getting sleep!    

3.)  My new tomato cages….correction, tomato towers.  Pricey yes, but I love them.  For the first year ever, my tomatoes are actually still standing tall in their cages and I will actually go pick them.  Before I always made Tom pick because I was sure I was going to find a snake digging around on the ground through the huge mess of fallen tomato plants and cages.  

4.)  Netflix….actually, I THINK I’m going to love Netflix.  And yes, I realize I’m totally behind the times and any “cool” factor I might have had going for me is completely gone….but I’m okay with that….and I’m still excited about Netflix!  We don’t have cable/satellite etc.…..haven’t for 4 years and honestly I haven’t really missed it.  Tom cringes every year at football season and we talk about getting cable, but for the few football games a year we can usually find a place to watch the games (Thank you Bruce and Sharon!).  It started as just a way to save money –when we first moved to Holdrege, we still at our apartment in Lincoln, I was still in school and Tom had just graduated, so in an effort to cut back on bills, we decided not to get cable.  And I never missed it, so we just never got it.  (If Tom has missed it he hasn’t complained much…other than football season.)  My neighbor told me a week or so ago that I could get Netflix for $7.99 a month and watch it on tv through our Wii.  Hello, why didn’t I know this before now!!  I was hoping to try it out tonight but that didn’t happen, but hopefully by next week I can report that I really do love Netflix as much as I think I’m going to! 

5.) Cooler weather.  LOVE the weather these past few days, LOVE having my windows open, LOVE being able to play outside with the kids without thinking I’m going to die.  Makes me ready for fall. 

I’m off to bed (after all, its nearly 10pm on a Friday night, isn’t that what everybody does?!? )  Someday I’ll get pictures off the camera and onto the computer….and on here for you all to see!   Someday when I haven’t chased kiddos all day, cleaned out my flower beds and filled them with new mulch, sprayed roundup on all the weeds out front, chopped the weeds around the garden and cleaned my house so its ready to show tomorrow.  

A Love/Hate Relationship

I haven’t decided yet if I’m bipolar or just what causes me to have such a love/hate relationship with things….
1.)  Micah sharing my breakfast.  Every. morning.  Micah gets up and eats breakfast with Tom and then as soon as I sit down to the table, he’s ready for round 2…..but round 2 must consist of whatever I’m eating (and not his own version of whatever I’m eating…we’re talking share the same yogurt and eat off the same spoon….alternating bites.)  Cute, yes, but sometimes I just want to eat my own yogurt!!
2.)  Makenzie deciding she’s a mama’s girl.  She is almost always a mama’s girl and 99% of the time I love it (who doesn’t love being the favorite, right?)  But lately Micah has decided to be a mama's boy....and one mom demanded by 2 kids 24/7 equals a mama sometimes just needs a break! 
3.)  Building a house.  Tom and I bought two lots about a month ago and building is something I am SUPER excited about, but it is also causes me way more anxiety than it should.  I want to get started NOW, but we have to wait on the city to put in water/sewer/utilities (yes, it would be good to have indoor plumbing in the new house!) which will probably take until at least spring.  This means we don’t even start building until spring, but I’m antsy to get started on plans etc…..and getting a budget into place for this new house because the potential cost also has me freaking out! 
4.)  My job.  I absolutely LOVE my job, but I’ve spent most of the last two weeks trying to answer interrogatories and respond to requests for production of documents (translation: sorting through ridiculously huge stacks of my client’s records trying to decide what to give the opposing party)  I HATE discovery! 
5.)  Drill weekends.  It really is a lot of fun to spend a weekend in Lincoln once a month….it’s a great chance for me to see lots of friends I probably wouldn’t otherwise see, but it’s also such.a.pain.  Every light in the motel goes at at 8 pm when the kids go to bed.  At the slightest noise, Micah is standing up in his pack n play yelling “mama, mama”.  Morning nap = nonexistent.  Saturday afternoon naps generally go well….for all 3 of us, because after all  wouldn’t want to make any noise and wake the sleeping babes!  Sunday afternoon naps are nearly impossible – checkout time is noon, even with a “late” checkout, they want us out by 1 (aka naptime)….and we never know what time Tom will get done.  Sometimes as early as 1:30, sometimes not until 4…..totally stresses me out, and it never fails, if I lay kids down at a friends house, Tom is done as soon as kids are out.  If I keep them up or plan on naps in the car, he’s not done till  4 and I’m stuck trying to entertain two way too tired crabby kiddos. 
On a happier note, the kids and I spent Sunday at the Lincoln zoo….SO.MUCH.FUN.  Pictures coming soon!

Experiment….Take 2

As you can see from the last post….posting from Word was a colossal failure….pictures didn’t make it!  And after doing a little research I figured out that blogger and word aren’t compatible…at least not when it comes to pictures.  But Windows Live Write is supposed to be the solution…..we’ll see if it works! 

 

Experimenting….

So after my last post took me way to many hours and the picture formatting was still goofy, I decided to try out the blogging function in Word and then publish my post to my blog….we'll see how it works! Blogger is totally frustrating when it comes to pictures…pretty sure they couldn't have made it more difficult if they tried! J Here's a few more pictures of my babes and their daddy…..because we're glad he's finally home (and because I want to make sure I can upload them in word….and if you don't see any pictures on the blog, you'll know it didn't work.)

Anybody else wonder at what point they became no longer technology savvy?!?! How did I cross that line that now requires me to ask my little brother to program my numbers in my new phone because I can't figure it out and has me cussing at blogger because I can't arrange my pictures the way I want. Oh to be young again! J

 

What We've Been Up To

I feel like I have nothing to blog about and too much to blog about all at the same time...lots going on, but nothing really blog worthy.....and when I start to type and update I don't know where to start, so you get an update the easy way...in pictures!!  

1)  Go Fish concert in Kearney Friday night before I left for San Antonio....this is the 2nd concert we've been to and WE LOVE these guys!!  WE as in I like them as much (and maybe even more) than Makenzie does! :)  Even Micah man got in on this concert!  

10 commandment boogie

It took Micah a while to warm up....he's not a huge fan of loud (ironic since he is the KING of loud!) and our 3rd row seats were a bit noisy! :)  I'll take free snuggles though! 

2.)  San Antonio date weekend --I flew out Saturday morning for San Antonio and got to spend the weekend with my hubby.  He graduated Monday and then we hit the road (the 15 hour road) for home! 

                                                                                Lookin' good Captain Nelsen!

And an equally cute, Junior Captain Nelsen!

Makenzie LOVES singing Lord's Army (see Go Fish above)....and Micah LOVES to do anything his sister does, so when Makenzie got out her army hat, Micah got Da-da's army hat! 

3.)  Mmmm, mmmm sweet corn!  Seriously, how cute are these two! 

For the record, the Go Fish shirt did get washed after the concert and before she wore it this day! :)

4.)  What would summer time be without a county fair!  We hit up the Holdrege fair the day Tom and I got home from San Antonio, but the real treat was the Elwood fair this weekend! 

My little dare devil....the tilt-a-whirl and octopus were her favorites!! 

Good to be a family of four again....even if it does mean riding on a little tiny train at the county fair! :)

Workin' mama

I don't know that I've ever faced as big a challenge in my life as the challenge to balance work and mommyhood....and maybe that's because its a whole lot of challenges wrapped up in one....the challenge to just get laundry done and meals on the table while working 3 days a week, the struggle to feel like there's enough of me to go around, the challenge to trust someone else with my children, the challenge to move past the criticism I've received in trying to balance the two and perhaps most of all, the struggle to determine if this is really something God has called me to do.  It has been an ongoing struggle [for the entire 3 1/2 years I've been a mom] and it is something I continue to struggle with [on a near daily basis] and I certainly don't think I've found all the answers, but I think along the way I've found some and I decided I should share them.  I don't intend this to be my soapbox, I'm definitely not here to tell all the moms in the world to get to work...just here to share where my heart is at and what I've discovered about God's purpose for my life. 

When I started law school, I couldn't wait to be an attorney and the longer I was in law school and the more "real world" experience I got, I grew even more excited.  Then in November 2007, something changed.  I had a beautiful baby girl....and the struggle set in - I spent the first few months of Makenzie's life finishing law school (graduated in December 2007) and studying for the bar exam (February 2007).

                                                          Literally, we spent nearly 2 full months like this!

And then when Makenzie was 4 months old, I started working part time.  And I started wondering if this was really what God called me to do.  Over the last few years, I've spent probably more time in prayer over this than about any other single thing.  I think the easiest way to show you what I've learned is to just show it as a dialogue - my chats with God over this very issue:

Are you sure I'm supposed to be working?
Natalie I didn't bring you through 2 1/2 years of law school and give you such a passion for what you're doing so that you cannot use this gift. 

But what about being a mom?
Have I not given you the perfect opportunity to balance both jobs?  I know you can do both, you need to trust me. (For those who may not know, I work part time...3 days a week in a WONDERFUL, totally family friendly firm.)

But what about leaving my kids with somebody else?
Look at what I've provided for you.  (Point well taken - Cori is an AMAZING Godly woman, my children LOVE going to her house and I seriously could not ask for a better person to care for my kids while I'm at work.)

But what if my kids are traumatized because I'm not with them? 
They're my kids, not yours Natalie and I'm plenty capable of taking care of them.  I'm not going to call you to do something that's going to hurt MY kids that I've allowed you to raise.

I could go on and on because God and I have had a lot of chats over this issue (apparently I'm a slow learner).  The bottom line is, time and time again I question whether or not I'm doing the right thing, and time and time again God answers my questions with a resounding "yes, you're doing exactly what I've called you to do."   Today was no exception.  I've been in a total post vacation funk this week.  I think getting home from vacation (4 really fun days with my kids!) combined with being w/o a hubby for the last 3+ weeks and knowing I still had 1 week to go just put me in a slump.  A weepy, overwhelmed, don't want to go to work, just want to stay home with my babies and stay on vacation slump.  And it didn't help that this was a busy week - 4 days of work instead of my typical 3 because I have court tomorrow.  Ugh.  And twice this week God totally made my day through the kiddos I work with. 

In a meeting on Wednesday afternoon, a teenage girl that I work with was talking about a conference she had gone to with other foster youth.  At the conference, the foster youth had discussed problems with the system and we were visiting about what those problems were.  One of the problems raised by a number of youth was that case managers, attorneys etc. are all too busy and don't devote the time necessary to the kids and families they work with.  This gal said, "I figured out that I'm really lucky because I have a really cool case manager and a really cool GAL (that's my role) and a really cool CASA work, and you all come to my house every month.  Nobody else in my group has everybody at their house every month to talk about what's going on." 

Today I got a totally random (random to me, no doubt perfectly planned by God) phone call from a kiddo I used to work with.  A bad ass (pardon the language), punk of a kid who I had some pretty good battles with and who had most recently spent some time in the YRTC.  A kid I was pretty sure was probably headed for prison if he didn't make some pretty serious life changes.....his dad was in prison for drug distribution, his brother has spent a number of nights in county jail on various charges, mom is in another state and not involved and this kid was basically left to fend for himself.  But the longer I worked with this kiddo the more I understood where he was coming from and why he had such a "tough guy" attitude and the more I grew to really enjoy this kid.  I continually told this kid, "you're a great kid but you've got to make better choices".  To make a long story short, when he was sent to YRTC last fall my work with him was done, but today he called me.  He was released from YRTC in May, he finished his GED and successfully applied to the state to have it converted to a high school diploma, he's living and working with an uncle, he's passed all his ua's since he was released and he has joined the Army and leaves for boot camp next month.  And he called because he just wanted to tell me thanks all my help.  I just sat at my desk and cried, thankful for the opportunity I've been given. 

And so, for now and for as long as God continues to call me to this path, I'll keep trying to find that balance....and when I fail miserably, I'll trust that God's grace is more than sufficient.